I have been feeling a little sad and discouraged lately but on this Valentine’s Day, God sent me a special reminder of His love. I thought it was worth mentioning as a way to encourage others who may be struggling.
This morning, my husband surprised me by leaving some roses on the counter with a Valentine’s Day card before he left for work. Before opening his card I got busy signing the card that I had purchased for him and decided to embellish the envelope with some hearts. I was going to deliver the card with some candy to his office later in the day. I drew two hearts with arrows then entwined two more at the top to symbolize how the two became one. Moments later I opened his card to me and read a very similar sentiment as the card that I had sent him. It reiterated that no matter our ups and downs, together we would get through life. What amazed me was that two identical entwined hearts were found on the front of the card. At the office I showed Ken the two cards. We both were amazed over our Valentine’s Day miracle.
I sat down to do a little bookkeeping while I was there and clumsily spilled some coffee that I had brought on my red turtleneck sweater. I got a paper towel, dampened it and began to blot out the spill to avoid a stain. As I blotted and looked in the mirror, I saw the image of a heart forming on my sweater. I quickly took a photo with my phone to prove the evidence that not once but twice in the same day I had witnessed a miracle. I took these reaffirming signs to be a message directly from the heart of God that His love for me is real and is quite evident during times when I need it most.
As a mother, I have witnessed several things about dating that are the trend with the current millennial generation and I must admit that I am concerned and disappointed, to say the least. Sadly, young people no longer have the delightful opportunity to meet other singles in safe common areas. They distrust these meet-up scenarios due to scary outbreaks of shootings and muggings that are rampant in the news. They have had to resort to screening potential dates through internet dating sites. They have replaced phone conversations with texts and Facebook chats which understandably decrease ones ability to interpret sincerity of motives or genuineness of character from voice inflections.
If your young people have happily met their significant other and gotten married, I congratulate you. You are in the minority, I think. That leaves many of us still hoping and praying for the Mr. or Mrs. Right to come along. I must continue to bite my nails as my children go out on dates with strangers in hopefully safe arenas. I must continue to listen to their woes and disappointing stories, as those that they meet turn out quite different from what their profiles suggest or that they lead them to believe by brief interactions on their devices before meeting face to face. I don’t know how many times now, my daughter has gotten excited over a potential meeting to be stood up…travelling even long distances to make the connection. I also can relay several instances where the potential didn’t have the courtesy to thank her after the initial meeting but suddenly seemed to disappear in thin air from all links ie. “unfriending” her leaving her to wonder what she did or did not do right. HOW RUDE!
How did this generation escape being taught the social etiquette that was drilled into us? Saying “please”, “thank you” or “excuse me” were sentiments that were spoken without thinking in our generation. We showed respect for one another by responding to RSVP’s, sent “thank you” notes for gifts or to show gratitude. We dressed to make a good first impression. I am not talking about a suit and tie for guys or dresses for girls but at least it would be courteous to show that some thought and effort were made to look presentable. Often dates these days think the more casual the better and wear sweats or shorts and a t-shirt as if the date was not important enough to take a shower for after going to the gym.
In the dating world of my generation, chivalry was not dead, and gentlemen were fairly plentiful. They had learned the do’s and don’ts when calling on a lady. They knew to open doors and pay for the meal. They would never leave a lady stranded somewhere or would not expect the lady to drive a long distance to meet. Even on a first date and even if there was not a love connection, they would walk her to her car, and would make sure she had gotten home safely after the meeting. Feminism hadn’t destroyed men’s attempts at showing manners.
Women on the other hand, were courteous enough not to order the most expensive item on the menu or choose the most expensive way to spend the date. They would give the guy a fair first chance at least and would thank him for taking her out afterwards even if there was no interest in a second date. Usually, it takes two dates to decide whether or not things go well as the first date is filled with nervousness and awkwardness. Are young people today really that impatient or shallow? Perhaps so.
There are many girls now that think they can be friends with every guy. What are the poor guys supposed to do about that? My son has two to three “friends” that won’t consider marriage but instead want to keep him hanging on as a friend indefinitely. That seems pretty unfair and selfish to me. It would be better to break it off for good than to lead a guy on to think that maybe one day the girl will give him another chance.